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This is where you stick random tidbits of information about yourself.
Age 23, living in sin in Twickenham with Cheesy
Likes
Movies
Books
Writing
Theatre
Hugs
Kittens
Chess
Scrabble (mostly beating Cheesy's butt)
Buffy The Vampire Slayer
Dislikes
Vegetables
Arguments
Cleaning
Trashy TV
Pretensions
Public Transport
Pets
Rabbits-Bambi, Fern, Sooty, Pippa-all deceased
Dog-Sammy-deceased :(
Fish-CatFlap-recently (and finally!) deceased
Cat-Tiggy-still scratching
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Technically Rachel
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Thursday, February 19, 2004
Monkeys Monkeys Monkeys
I had the car journey through Land of the Stupid the other night. The start of the journey was not helped by being on the arse-end of every traffic light through Sunbury - sometimes you just swear the buggers gang up on you. Hit the Sunbury roundabout only to be thwarted by a monkey driving a car. This car-monkey obviously has never much thought of blind spots. Or lanes. Or indicating for that matter. This monkey in a toyota (you see how this causes me a conflict of my opinion since my little motor Mac is of that gene pool himself) pulls out right in front of my on a very busy roundabout. I of course slam my brakes, and hoot my horn. Now, as a driver, there are two key responses to a hooting horn when changing lanes:
1) Stop changing lanes you idiot and stay in the lane you were in where you KNOW you are clear to drive. Don't panic - it's a ROUNDabout, hence you can come back round and get in your lane;
2) Move your ass quicker into the lane to avoid the put-upon car banging into you
You do not continue to change lanes AND slow down, causing little me to slam-slam the brakes and come to a complete stop so I don't dent your frickin side door. Car-Monkey.
What pisses me most off about this is that if I had bumped the muppet it would be my insurance paying out for the damage since technically I would have crashed into him.
So my journey was off to a grumpy start.
And coming off the roundabout behind the car-monkey, and got on to the A316 where nothing moved. Cars. Just sat there. Obviously bored. Accident obviously. Some other car-monkey probably changed lanes at a stupid time too. When my Mac finally creeped past the scene taking up two lanes all that was there were two cops and a bunch of traffic cones. This leads me to believe (in the absence of ambulance et al) that this accident happened quite some time a go, and left me internally ranting on the crappiness of insurance companies that no doubt needed everything left where it was so they could figure out who to blame.
But the monkiness does not end there. Finally away from the traffic chaos, driving along one a the darker roads home. There's a small truck parked. Nothing special there, although it is in a stupid place that makes over-taking it difficult. In the dark I can see a small mound near the front on the road. I reckon it's probably a box, or something of that ilk. But no - it's a truck-monkey! A person, lying in the middle of the road, looking at his tyre - lying down! I mean, this monkey deserves to be run over, surely? A dark road, the idiot's dressed in black. Parked on a bloody busy road. Now he may well have broken down in this exact spot - but if so, where the sod are his hazard lights? Ishk. Perhaps there is a good explanation for all of it - but I don't know it, and prefer instead to mock the man for his monkiness. Hurrah
12:22 pm
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